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Temporary Change

So the good news:  I have a job!
The bad news: It's temporary!

Basically, I'm going on temporary leave from being a temporary housewife, to go and be a temporary employee, after which, if I do not find permanent work, I shall return to being a temporary housewife.

Let's be honest: after almost 10 months of unemployment, this was looking less and less temporary, AMIRIGHT?

Admittedly, the first part of my unintentional sabbatical was fraught with loads and loads of guilt, topped with a generous dollop of humility and a solid whack to my self esteem.  I was inundated with the memories of my first attempt at staying at home (with an infant) and recalled the horrid feelings of inadequacy that I had at the time (post partum depression AND psychosis for the win!).

Luckily, I slowly realized that I'm not suffering from PPD/P anymore, I don't have an infant anymore (puppy really doesn't count)... and I actually grew to like my position in the home.  Well, I wasn't thrilled with the cleaning or tidying aspect.  But I got better and better at it!  Plus, once I got my chores done, I did a lot to fill my days.  I put a solid dent in two novels I'm writing, listened to some audiobooks while organizing the house, did some home improvement projects...

But most of all?  Even with all that self care going on, the best (and I do mean this sincerely) was the privilege of being here for G during what is the biggest change she has gone through to date.  I was there practically every morning, every afternoon, every bedtime.  I wasn't a jolly Mary Poppins, for sure (my patience is as thin as muslin these days), but we've played countless games, read tons of books, and got in so many snuggles.

Best part of this new temporary position?  I get to work from home.  My early mornings will be wiled away in the basement office (seriously so cozy, no joke), then when she gets up, I shut down for a couple of hours while I help her get ready for the day.  I still get to walk her to the bus stop.  I then work the rest of my 8 hours until she gets home.  So I still get to be there to walk her back from the bus stop.  We still get to chat on the short walk home, put together an afternoon snack, cook dinner together, watch TV together, go through the bedtime routine together.

I've often pondered the meaning of the start of our Wisconsin life.  And this is the second person in our lives that this change has allowed us to be there for.  Even with my husband slogging through 10 hour days in his upstairs office, G can run in and say good afternoon to him.  She still gets to say good morning.  He doesn't commute so we all got to sit down at dinners together.

Together.

I am still searching for something permanent, whether that means being my own boss or being someone else's monkey.  But for now, we continue this temporary life together.

And that is wonderful.

Comments

  1. yo mamaFebruary 1, 2018 at 8:12 AM

    Sweetie I'm so happy for you. Enjoy those days with your daughter she'll grow up way too fast

    ReplyDelete

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