Life Update

I just found out from my latest interview with that I did not get the job.

In another instance, I checked up on an unmoving resume online to find out that the company that I submitted it to in August finally decided that they were not going to pursue candidacy with me.

Needless to say, my employment endeavors have been humbling.  Very humbling. I've always identified with my job.  Even during my first stint as a voluntary stay at home mom, I was very much uncomfortable with the homemaking making lifestyle.  Mostly because I had no idea what to do to help myself feel fulfilled.

I find myself in an extended period of unemployment.  It's no longer a joking matter.

What do I do?

I find myself embarrassed.  Am I not interviewing correctly? Am I unlikable? I've been deluding myself on how my work ethic has come across? Why doesn't anybody want to employ me?  The reality is likely that the climate for an environmental scientist/geologist is not exactly friendly. Maybe the field is just chock-full of really good candidates and I'm not a terrible person for the job but just not the best person for the job.  No matter what the reality is, the situation blows. 

Now that I'm headed into the holiday season with nary a paying job in sight, I'm going to be stepping up my volunteer work with the school.  Exercise. Continue work on my novel. Continue working on crafty Christmas projects.  Keep looking for a job.  I'm exploring the cheapest way to become a school teacher. I'm looking at college-level teaching. I'm even looking at a doctoral program.

I'm a big believer in "everything happens for a reason".  Even in the worst crappiest times of our lives is designed to create the futures were meant to have.  And outside of being unemployed, I don't even have a sucky life! My life is full of goodness. I have a house, we have an income, our kid is happy and healthy. Home is full of laughter and adventures.  Comparison to a great many people in this world, our life is pretty good.  Anyway.  Point is that me being around home more is probably important for a variety of reasons. Just because life is not unfolding the way I had planned it doesn't mean it isn't the way it was meant to be.

I still hope that I'm a temporary housewife but temporary is translating into a full year of unanticipated unemployment. I need to get my s*** together.

And still try to keep my chin up and my sense of humor intact.